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1 The
possible impact of MOL-Guidance
A closed structure, like MOL seems to be according to the stories
of ex-MOL clients in my praxis, will not allow any real criticism or deep
emotional contact with critical thinking minds outside the cult. They
don’t even want to see any real emotional attachment between the people
within the cult. Why? Well…because this would be a threat to existence of
the cult-structure.
As I told under “ Language,
manipulation and illusions”, according to the experience
of one of my clients, coming from MOL, the MOL seems to have found a
cruel ( I think ) solution to the sometimes growing attachments between
people inside the structure: guidance: They will tell them f. i. that for
finding the way “ home”(in MOL-terms this means god..after-life, according
to my understanding of it)they have to let go of this kind of attachment…Love
and friendship are, according to MOL-principles, just “illusions”. To
“help” people let go of their boy/girl-friend, they’ll give them “
guidance”.
That guidance, although the word itself sounds nice, seems to be in
case of letting go, nothing else than real psychological torture and
abuse. That’s at least how I understand the story of some clients in my
praxis.
There are other cults, known to me, which show a same kind of, what
I think of as a cruel activity like this “guidance
of the MOL”. They also associate that cruelty with a nice
word….And that seems to be..again..a language-manipulation-trick to
create “the invisible barrier of miscommunication”.
If that is the case it will work like this: When somebody uses,
for example, the word “guidance” towards a victim, meaning to say he/she
wants to help the victim in his/her search for a way out, assuring the
victim that he/she can have the trust that is necessary …….the victim
might react with the emotional pain that has been associated with the
word guidance…..and run away. If that happens, these words have so-called
“triggers”. This running away or closing-up or shut down can also appear
because of other words which might have triggers like that: love,
friendship, care etc…. This running away/closing-up/shut down is one of
the biggest nightmares of people who try or have tried to help their
dear-ones out of cult-influence, I assure you.
But it is even worse for the victims themselves. They may be
confused, feeling hell they came out under their feet again….need comfort
and love from dear-ones while on the other hand they are too scared
and/or shut down to get the love and friendship that even often stands
just around the corner.
If these triggers work….and if the outcome is that in spoken
words the victim doesn’t want to have any contact with his/her
helping-somebody ….the helping-somebody has no other options than to
respect that choice….and…wait….despite feelings of restlessness, worries,
sadness…..and maybe worse….waiting is the best thing to do…because that
is the best way to show the respect the victim didn’t get in the cult..and
surely not within the “guidance” if it is like it seems to be.
Reliving pain form a cult-period can be o.k. if the victim copes
well and doesn’t isolate him/her-self too much, meaning:..if the victim
doesn’t really run away.
In my experience, writing down the emotional pain, writing down
exactly what happened when the emotional pain came…in the right
order…might be very helpful. The idée of this is, shortly, that the
emotional pain, sitting in the limbic system of our brains, will slowly
get into the higher places of our brains, just by writing down…using
language…and the coping will go better…little by little…
According to my
perception
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